All Hallow's Eve

Tomorrow is Halloween. I will be working my usual night shift. I fear that my fellow B.O.N.E.R. doc, Zorba, will have the scarier time tonight. Young adults and older teens use the occasion for excessive drinking, drugging and hormonally fueled shenanigans. Costumes, alcohol, parties, and hell raising are guaranteed to bump up the ER census.

My wife loves to hand out the packaged candy to the local kids. Our neighborhood contains many families with young children. Frightening tales of tampered goodies with poisons, needles and medications require that treats must be commercially produced and dispensed in their original wrappings. Earlier in my career, the ER offered to x-rays treat-bags to ensure that no metallic foreign bodies had been secreted into the candy.

The tricks of Halloween usually are benign and stale; egging, "TP ing", and flaming dog poop bags are common pranks. More innovative tricks such as hallucinogens in the cider, can swamp the ER with spaced out patients dressed as witches, devils, and assorted celebrities.

The application and adornment of the physiognomy of the Halloween party goer may lead to visits to the ER. Superglue is often used to attach horns and other embellishments. The problem arises when the glue gets into the eyes or near the nether regions. Removing the glued-on bits may cause avulsion of the underlying skin. OUCH!

In the Northeast, where I reside, hypothermia is also a risk during Halloween revelries. Costumes are often skimpy in their coverage and wearing a coat would ruin the ensemble. The effects of alcohol contribute to the hypothermia potential. Alcohol irritates the esophagous and stomach giving the imbiber a sense of inner heat. The vasodilating effects of alcohol cause increased heat loss from the skin and more rapid lowering of the core body temperature.

The truly tragic aspect of Halloween is the four fold increase, in auto-pedestrian accidents involving children, compared to the other 364 days of the year. Parents be advised, make your child visible and keep their own vision unencumbered. Glow sticks and necklaces, flashing LED lights, and reflective material are all excellent measures to make your child visible to drivers. Avoid masks and hoods that can limit the child's visual field. Drivers need to be extra cautious. The aftermath of injuring or killing a child are devastating for the victim's family and for the driver.

I do not wish to spoil the joy of Halloween. The world's oldest ER doc has fond memories of "trick or treat" ing with my friends back in the 1950's and 1960's. As a avid mimic, I would couple my costume with an appropriate accent. My mother's jodhpurs, and riding boots (she was a volunteer in the Women's Army Aircorp during WW 2) were paired with a puffy white shirt, monocle and my best British accent. A dhoti (Indian garment), begging bowl and an accent I learned from the movie, "Gunga Din" transformed me into Gandhi.

Today, October 30, is my twin sister's birthday. Yes, our birthdates are 28 days and almost 2 years apart. Think Danny Devito and the Arnold in the movie "Twins". No one embraces the joy and exuberance of the holiday more than my friend and spiritual twin, Joanne. Happy Birthday sis!